Saturday, July 2, 2016

The light

The light at the end of the tunnel is starting to shine a little more brightly. We are less than six months  away from graduation, and the weeks after that will be the licensing process for The Hubs to become a psychNP. The job hunting/interview process has already started, and we are facing decisions of where do we want to/need to move?

We knew we would probably have to move away from here. We have tried a couple of different times before, but it never quite worked out. So in my mind I think I felt like we would always be here even though that was never the original plan. Originally the plan was to live here for about five years. This summer marks eleven years, and if you count my four college years, fifteen years.  I have lived here almost my entire adult life, except  for those two years when I up and moved to live all by myself and teach in a random town in Arizona.

Moving wasn't that scary when I was twenty-two. But now it isn't just me I am thinking about - the big picture is me, The Hubs, and our two kids. On one hand an adventure and a fresh start somewhere that doesn't have snow sounds exciting and wonderful. Yet on the other hand it sounds terrifying and exhausting. Will my kids make friends? Will we find a good church? Will The Hubs like the place where he works? What is the right place for us? Will I be able to homeschool and get Bug to his therapies and get this house ready to sell? That last question makes me want to go eat a tub of ice cream and take a nap.

God's grace and provision has been enough to sustain us these last eleven years (well even more so these last thirty-five.) I can look back and see how He has ordained each and every step, even the painful ones. Through each trial and each success, every loss and every blessing, He has continued to draw me closer to Himself and strengthen my faith. Sometimes I feel weary of my faith needing to be strengthened. But I will trust Him. I will trust Him with all of the uncertainties, and I will trust Him if the light illuminates the next step or if it does not.

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