Friday, October 23, 2015


There was a moment yesterday filled with two little boys laughing. Bug was working on a fine motor activity on the iPad - one we hadn't done in over a month until he requested it again this week.  Apparently when it got updated over the time off, it was updated with some new sound effects, and it makes a funny sound whenever Bug makes a mistake.

However, Bug has gotten better at this activity and doesn't make very many mistakes. Therefore Bubby was sitting next to him, intentionally making mistakes to get the sound effect.  The mom-teacher instinct was for me to say, "Stop," because I didn't want Bug to start intentionally making the mistakes, too. But there on the twin bed my two sons kept laughing hysterically every thirty-seconds or so when the iPad would say "bonnnng" to an incorrect tap.  Laughing so hard they could hardly catch their breath to keep going - but they did - only to crack up once again.

I did not move, as much as I wanted to record the moment, because then the spell would be broken. Instead I sat listening to the rare sound of them laughing together for several minutes, the way I always imagined two brothers would.

Thursday, October 15, 2015

coming to faith - a letter

Dear Bubby,

We were in the minivan Tuesday morning - you, me and Bug - driving to my BSF meeting. Pulling out of the driveway you asked me a couple of questions about heaven.  This was not unusual. At least once a week, usually more, you ask me theological questions on a drive somewhere. The questions were answered to the best of my ability, with one I clearly remember saying, "That's probably a question for Pastor Doug."  We moved on with normal chatter and silence and music and your little brother asking to listen to the Veggie Tales cd.

A few minutes later we were driving down Kansas, and you asked me for a tissue. Handing you one, I asked if you were okay, to which you responded you felt like crying about your sin.  This was pretty out of the blue since you had not been in any real trouble that morning or the day before, and our conversation hadn't been about sin. So we chatted about sin and about Jesus and as usual, I asked if you had any other questions.  You didn't, so I continued to focus on the road until you told Bug to stop talking so you could pray. And there in the minivan you prayed your own version of the Sinner's Prayer, and then announced that you were following Jesus now. That you were now a Christian.

My heart went a million directions at once. I wanted to be enthusiastic but also cautious.  One of my biggest fears of raising you in a Christian home is that you would become a Christian to please me and your dad or because it was the thing to do. It is a hard balance in teaching you about the faith that is central to my very being without letting it become something you would do just because you are a MacB.

I asked a few more questions, and then I called your dad. I went to my meeting, and upon picking you up from the childcare there, the two older women working that day were all smiles because you had told them also that you are now a Christian.

I am writing all of this down so that you and I both remember this in the years ahead. I want you to know that my heart is full of joy and peace about the decision you have made. I do not know where you learned the Sinner's Prayer. That is not really a script we use at our church.  There is no altar call in the sense of an altar call that I witnessed for much of my first thirty years in the Church. You do not attend a children's church (like I did until I was seven or eight) that constantly asked us if we were sure we weren't going to hell. And although I was raised in a church-going home, already I know that your faith-journey is different than mine.

I don't know where exactly the need to come to Jesus to forgive your sins and follow Him with your life came from on this last Tuesday. I rest in the belief that the Holy Spirit has been growing the seeds that have been planted by your Sunday school and Awana teachers, BSF leaders, pastors, and hopefully by your family as your dad and I have done our best to answer your questions and live out an authentic faith in front of you from day to day.

A part of me worries because you are on the young side to come to faith, but God keeps bringing to mind examples in the Bible of the young people He called and His emphasis on having faith like a child.  This week I read something that essentially said when God gets someone's attention spiritually it is because He has made that person ready to accept. God reminded me that salvation is not of works, it is of faith and it is a gift of God not of ourselves - and so the God Who is calling you is able to give that faith to you - no matter if you are six, sixteen or sixty - because it is about His glory and His purposes for you and for His kingdom. Once again, God is asking me, your mama, to trust Him with your life and what He will do for you and in you. I see that you understand your need for a Savior. I see that you are thankful for what He has done for you. I see that you want to follow Him and live for Him, and it makes me cry happy tears.

You are His, sweet boy. He has called you, and He will continue to lead you and grow you. I pray that you would see His good purposes in both the beautiful and the painful moments of your life. I pray that you would sense His nearness. I pray that you would be bold for Him and be filled with His love for others. I pray you would know that you are adopted into sonship through Jesus Christ in accordance with His pleasure and will and that He has lavished His grace upon you.  You will make mistakes and stumble and doubt in the years ahead, and when that happens I pray that you will fall each time on your Savior rather than yourself. He is able and has already paid the price. You are His. I pray that you would know that nothing - NOTHING - can separate you from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus.  I pray that you would see His faithfulness woven throughout the seasons of your life and that you would remain faithful to Him.

Love always,

you with the letters that were given to us for you
on your baby dedication day six years ago
to be read by you when you came to faith in Jesus
(tears were shed by you and me today reading them)

Wednesday, October 7, 2015

A conversation for World CP Day

It's World Cerebral Palsy Day. Would you take a minute today to explain to a child in your life about CP? It could be a conversation like this...

Adult: Do you know your friend G.?Do you know he has a condition called cerebral palsy?
Child: What does that mean?
Adult: It means he will do some things the same as you and some things will be different.
Child: Like what?
Adult: Sometimes G drools. He doesn't do this on purpose. Can you show me your muscles?
(Child flexes muscles)
Adult: Well, just like there are muscles in your arms, there are also muscles in our mouths. They help us chew, swallow, and open and close our mouths. G has muscles in his mouth that aren't as strong because of his cerebral palsy. He can't always keep his mouth closed and then his drool escapes. We never make fun of someone for drooling. He does not drool on purpose. It makes him feel sad when people laugh at his drooling. Would it make you sad if someone laughed at you?
Child: Yes.
Adult: G also has other muscles in his body that have a hard time working. He can climb and run but not as fast as other kids. That is because he has cerebral palsy. He is working very hard on learning to run, and I bet he would love a friend to walk with him sometimes when he has to go slower than everyone else. Do you think you could sometimes be that type of friend to G?
Child: Yes, I could.
Adult: Even if he is slower on the stairs or the playground, we can still play with him. If you broke your leg and couldn't walk, would you want your friends to still say hi and play games with you or would you want to always sit alone by yourself?
Child:I would want friends.
Adult. You might see that G can't hold a crayon or a cup or a fork like you can. That is something his muscles are still learning to do. Just like your muscles at learning to ride a bike, his muscles are learning to do other things right now.
Child: Is he like a baby?
Adult: No, G is a preschooler just like you. He likes music and stories and dogs and the park, just like you. He might not talk to you in the same way as some of your other friends, but I bet he would like to play with you sometimes. He understands what you are saying and doing even if he doesn't talk very much. He is a fun kid, just like you.

*Please remember if you comment on this blog or on the Facebook page for this blog that I do not use my kids' real names on this blog.  Thank you!