I have been reading Kara Tippetts' book, Big Love: The Practice of Loving Beyond Your Limits with a small group of women. It has led to some very good discussion as we examine kindness in our relationships - primarily parenting, but also in marriage, family dynamics and other relationships. In one section Kara wrote about a time when her husband had to be gone for work for a week at a time - and she was at home pregnant and/or with very young children, and how that was hard for many reasons. She said that God placed a mantra in her head one year when her husband was gone, "There is enough grace for this. There is enough grace for this," and she began looking for grace, for joy, for the gifts in the hard things. (This idea reminded me of Ann Voskamp counting the gifts, even the hard blessings, in her book One Thousand Gifts.)
So for the past couple of days Kara's phrase keeps going through my head, "There is enough grace for this." At times it has brought me strength to complete the task. At times it has brought a smile to my face and a soft answer from my lips. At times it has brought me to tears because after I have thought of her phrase, I have found myself praying, "Help me, Jesus. This is so hard."
The last twenty-four hours with Bug have been difficult. His schedule/routine was off again this week because we had out of town visitors, and last night he could not get to sleep. Lots of crying. Lots of restlessness. Today has also been difficult for him because of his lack of sleep as well as recovering from a routine change. "There is enough grace for this," I whisper to myself in these moments.
Tears poured out this afternoon as I was driving thinking of all of the things I need grace for in this season.
There is enough grace for the long hard days.
There is enough grace for endless questions from my curious kindergartner.
There is enough grace for the potty training which has mysteriously regressed the last two weeks.
There is enough grace for the season ahead of more schooling for The Hubs.
There is enough grace for the never-ending laundry.
There is enough grace for the Tuesday nights I am without childcare and miss the book study.
I didn't even realize the tears were flowing until Bubby said from the backseat, "Mommy are you crying?" I quickly composed myself.
Grace is a powerful thing. It isn't positive thinking for me, but a trust and surrender to the one Who is the Giver of grace. There is enough for each day. There is enough for each moment.