Five Minute Friday is a chance to write for only five minutes on a given prompt without editing and then share and connect with other writers. This week's prompt is whisper. More details can be found here.
The stranger in the seat in front of us leaned into his toddler's ear, "Look at that baby."
My three and a half year old had been making pre-meltdown, kind-of-happy-but-could-turn-at-any-moment noises. I was juggling him and my content and helpful five year old alone in a new place.
"He is three and a half, not a baby! Having special needs does not make someone a baby!" is what I wanted to stand up and yell.
But instead I ignored and whispered, "shhh shhh shhh," in the ears of my youngest, trying to distract him with bouncing and a couple of other things.
It didn't work. Less than ten minutes later my child got very loud. Slightly upset but mostly just loud because he doesn't understand how to whisper or why we whisper or when we whisper.
He was calm by the time we got to the car, happy to be out of that big room, happy to be going home. My five year old handled our quick exit with grace. But I sat in my car and cried for a few minutes before driving home.
"It's not fair," says the voice in my head, the voice that has been telling me all my life of all the unfairness of the world.
I wrestle with that statement on fairness. I know the right answers, most days I even believe the right answers, but if I think too much about the future I get overwhelmed and frustrated that I don't seem to have the keys to unlock my child's mysterious mind., to help ease the frustration he seems to be feeling at times.