Saturday, July 20, 2013

being vulnerable (when paperwork hurts)

Two hours.

That is the amount of time tonight I spent (with The Hubs) filling out paperwork on medical history, family hisotry, and a whole lot of questions/inventories on Bugaboo's behaviors and development.

My hand hurts. My mind hurts. My heart hurts.

We have been noticing more.  The Hubs has enough experience in his counseling field to notice some things. My years in the classroom have caused me to notice some things. At the advice of a good friend who has kept up with what Bugaboo news and has observed him in a natural and informal setting (and who also happens to be autism expert for a school district), I once again talked to our pediatrician.

A neurodevelopmental disorder and autism center sent us a bunch of paperwork to fill out to see if they will see us.

The inventories and checklists show that there is something going on with our little guy's development - which we have obviously known as we have been investigating possible causes for over a year now. As he grows in some ways, other things show up.

I don't need a label, but I do need to have access to getting the best help/support/research for my son as possible. I am hoping this center will be able to help us understand better what is going on with Bug.

Say a prayer for this continued process for our family. Maybe one day everything will just click. But that is not a guarantee. The not knowing is very hard, but I know that knowing will be hard, too.


  1. I know how you feel! We have a similar situation with our son. Not knowing is hard. Praying that you will get answers that are more than a label...answers that will provide help for your little guy.

  2. I'll keep you and your little guy in my prayers! Hoping you get some answers soon.

  3. The worst thing about all the paperwork (for me) is the overwhelming feeling like I did something wrong, that somehow the genetic combination of husband + me= something is wrong with my baby. Praying for the best possible result...the services your son needs to help make sense of this crazy world, and the assurance for you, the parents, that you have done everything you possibly could to help him. Carry on Mama!


Thanks for stopping by and sharing your thoughts with me.