My doctor appointment went well today. My OB was actually on time! (gasp! that never happens). They are not going to do the protein test at this time (the one that could show if I might go into labor in the next two weeks) because I am not dilated and my "uterus is quiet." (Their words, not mine.) I received my first round of steroids today, so that put my mind at ease a lot. I was very concerned about getting them in on time incase we go early. They sent me home with the other dose and said my brother could give it to me at home after 24 hours or more passes. Awesome - that will save me a little money since my insurance sucks and doesn't cover me getting injections. (And very little else I might add...)
They did put me on the monitor for 20ish minutes today just to make sure things were okay. (That is how they determined the volume of my uterus, haha.) I know I have heard Mac2.0's heartbeat several times, but it is usually just for a minute every other week. Today I stretched out (somewhat uncomfortably on weird recliner) and listened to my baby undisturbed for quite some time. I had been worried about not bonding as much with this little guy as I did with Bubby in the womb, but this morning I sat back in awe of this miracle. Seriously - something that started out as two cells is now two pounds and fourteen inches long and with a heartrate in the 150's. When Bubby was first born (and okay, still from time to time now) I just would sit and watch him sleep, watch him breathe, completely mesmorized. Today I felt similarly mesmorized as this morning I reclined, hands above the monitor on my belly listening to one of the most beautiful sounds ever - a baby heartbeat and him kicking and moving around inside of me.
Humans are not some cosmic mistake, accident, phenomenon. We are created too complexly for that, in my opinion. There is a life growing inside of me - already alive and kickin' - and he is here for a reason, and I have the distinct honor of being his mama.