Sunday, May 9, 2010

My First Mother's Day

It is my first official Mother's Day - at least with my baby on the outside!  In Sunday school today, one of the facilitators asked what is the hardest thing about being a mom and the best thing about being a mom.  Here are some of my thoughts on the topic with less than one year under my belt:

Hardest Things About Being a Mom:

  • Watching your baby in pain.  I saw a lot of that at the beginning, and I will never, ever forget the sounds of Buddy's cries on the days he had his food taken away in the NICU for his own protection.  There is nothing worse than seeing your child suffering and being completely helpless to intervene.

  • Knowing when to trust your instincts and when to trust the "experts."  Somewhere there is a balance, but I don't think I have figured it out yet.

  • Feeling like you have to compare your child to others.  I try really hard not to do that, but sometimes other people seem to want to compare.  "He's not crawling/walking/sleeping-through-the-night/fill-in-the-blank... yet?"  There are moments when some people say this that I feel like I have done something wrong as a mama, even though logically I know that is not true.  I know there will be a lifetime of these comments, and I just hope that I do my best never to participate in the comparison game.

  • Not getting enough sleep.  I LOVE sleep.  Seriously.  I would rather sleep than eat. In fact, I chose that this morning when hubby asked if I would like him to make pancakes.  I replied, "I would actually rather have some more sleep."  So he graciously took the baby and played with him awhile/got him his breakfast while I slept for about an hour.  Glorious.

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The best things about being a mom:

  • Holding your baby for the first time and knowing he belongs to you.  There is nothing more precious than that moment. I cry just thinking about it!

  • Watching all of the firsts. I know I am only at the beginning of this journey of firsts, but seeing the first smile, hearing the first laughs and babbles, watching the first roll - every new thing Buddy does makes me burst with pride.

  • Having sweet conversations - and yes, we have conversations even though he doesn't have actual words yet.  Buddy's most talkative time is in the morning (go figure that my child is a morning person!), and some of the best chats we have are when he is snuggled in our bed before we really start the day.

  • For me one of the best things was during pregnancy when I could feel him moving inside of me.  The first time I felt him for sure was right when I was about to fall asleep one night.  I remember I woke Hubby up when I exclaimed, "OH!" after I felt Buddy do a sommersault.

  • Watching him fall asleep on my lap.  I know these days won't last forever, so I will cherish them while they are here.

  • Just having fun. Remembering to stop and enjoy the moments instead of worrying about the dust on the piano or the dishwasher needing unloaded.

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